I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize