11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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