i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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