Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
