You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
