I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
