i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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