The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
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