You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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