How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
