his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
