all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
