This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
