She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Randomize
