It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
