You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
