found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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