two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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