omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize