Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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