Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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