I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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