Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
