The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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