A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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