Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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