I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
