I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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