Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
