this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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