i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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