Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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