Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
this is an emotional support booty call
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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