you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
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