an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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