Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I would ride that face into the sunset
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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