My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
