I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
