are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
tell me about the fingering
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