I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
