Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
