Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.