on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Randomize
