Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Randomize