Christians are straight up FREAKS
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
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I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
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I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
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