break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i would punch a child for taco bell
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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