why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
