Non-Jews are for practice
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
