Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize