You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I wannas sexs uuuuu
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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