I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
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