Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
