Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
